Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
do nipples grow back?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
