For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
