Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize
