The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
there is glitter all over my balls
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
