No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize
