I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize