Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I'm gonna fight the coyote
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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