If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
