I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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