I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
