I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
