Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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