if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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