i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
