No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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