Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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