i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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