I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
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