Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
You've changed since you got that strap on
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
