Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
