I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
