maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
