Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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