yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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