plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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