You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
