I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
where are you?
Hypothermia
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize