Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
