As long as you're not dating white guys again.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
