why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize