I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Randomize
