apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
