8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
