yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I've blown a few things in my day
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
