im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Randomize
