I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
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