Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Randomize