I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
