margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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