I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
The dick lei will go down in squad history
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
