I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Only a mothe r could love this liver
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
