Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
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