Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize