do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Randomize
