Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Randomize