I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
