At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Dignity is for republicans.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
