What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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