So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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