I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
home. puking in laundry basket.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Randomize