also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
