dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize