just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
